Conception (The Wellingtons, #4) Read online

  “Even if it is going to be a rental, that doesn’t mean he couldn’t come back, even for a weekend.”

  She’s got a point.

  She leans across the bar and squeezes my hand. “You can’t give up hope. Even if it feels impossible.”

  It’s at this moment that Sam sidles up to the bar and drops down on the stool next to me. “You come here often, babe?” he asks, lowering his voice by two octaves.

  Thankful for the distraction, I twist to face him. “What’s the matter, Sam? Striking out with the blonde over there?” I ask, lifting my chin and gesturing to the girl he was flirting with earlier.

  “Boyfriend back home. Not interested,” he sighs then shrugs. “No harm. I’d rather spent my night with my best girl anyways.”

  If Sunny’s been a constant at my side, Sam’s a close second. I didn’t disclose to Sam or Joe what happened between Knox and me—or that I had feelings for him. But if Sunny’s to be believed, everyone knew it except for us. Sam’s taken it upon himself to become a one-man cheering up squad. I think their plan is to continually distract me until I’m over the guy.

  The distracting part works during the day. It’s at night when I miss him, crave him the most.

  Still, I have a fonder appreciation for Sam after these past few weeks. And I tell him.

  “I don’t want to get all mushy or anything, but I just want you to know you’ve really been a rock. The three of you have been, and I’m an ass for staying away for so long.”

  His boyish grin fades just a bit. “It’s all right, Meems. We all understood. Just… Just don’t go disappearin’ on us again, capisce?”

  “I won’t, Sam. I promise.”

  He shoulder-checks me and tosses me a teasing grin. “If you ever get lonely, you know where to find me. There’s nothin’ wrong with a one-way ticket to pound town, if ya know what I mean,” he drawls, wiggling his eyebrows.

  I lean over and ruffle his already rumpled dark hair. “Sorry, buddy. You’re gonna have to punch your ticket elsewhere.”

  He shrugs and gives me a wink. “It was worth a shot.”

  Zombies’ “Time of the Season” comes over the jukebox and I laugh as Sam hops up from the bar. I swivel to watch the way he wiggles his hips and shimmies along with the beat. His moves rival those of Prince, and part of me wishes we had chemistry. A rebound would make this all so much easier.

  Then again, that’s what Knox was supposed to be and look how that turned out.

  “Come on, Meems! Don’t leave me hangin’ out here all on my own. I feel the rhythm and I’ve got to move!” He holds a hand out, wanting a dance partner, shakin’ his ass along with the beat.

  Sunny’s shaking her head and giggling. “Wanna wallow in your self-pity, or do you wanna help the poor sap out?”

  Sunny’s dealing out all the sage advice tonight, and I find I want to listen. I leap from my stool and sashay into Sam’s outstretched, awaiting arms. It’s not the same. It’s not Knox.

  But it won’t ever be again.

  Might as well get used to it.

  Sunny and I make the drive to Knoxville the day before the concert. It’s the first time I’ve been back to my apartment this summer. It feels like a lifetime ago that I left. I tell her I have to run a couple of errands, and she doesn’t mind staying at my apartment while I’m gone.

  When I return, Sunny holds up a pair of sweatpants with an eyebrow raised. I laugh. Genuinely laugh. I haven’t done that since Knox left, and I wonder if maybe I’m healing.

  “Oh my god. Those are Robert’s.” I roll my eyes and snatch them from her grasp. “I should probably search the place for any other mementos he may have left.”

  “I wasn’t snooping,” she says, and I give her a pointed look. “Fine, you caught me. There’s a photo of you two on your nightstand. Girl, gotta tell you, he’s nothing like Knox.”

  My insides twist. Okay, so maybe healing is a little ways off. “I’m pretty sure that’s why I was attracted so quickly.”

  Sunny nibbles on her lower lip. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought him up.”

  I smile and wave the thought away. “It’s fine. It happened. If I pretend it didn’t, I lose all the memories. I can be sad it’s over while still appreciating the experience.”

  “That’s a good way of looking at it.”

  “Now, what do you say we order takeout and watch bad movies? We’ve got a big night tomorrow and I don’t want to be falling asleep or nursing a headache while Steve Perry’s bare chest is, like, one-hundred feet away from me.”

  “Agreed, but on one condition.”

  “What?”

  She wrinkles her nose. “Please don’t make me watch Mesa of Lost Women again.” She shivers. “The thought of being injected with spider venom…”

  I laugh. “Fine, instead of bad movies, how about ones with eye candy?” I offer, knowing she’ll jump at that.

  In fact, I let her choose.

  Though I could kick myself when she selects What a Way to Go! I can’t blame her. When it comes to eye candy, getting Paul Newman, Dean Martin, Gene Kelly, Robert Mitchum, and Dick Van Dyke all in one film is pretty much the ultimate choice.

  Hell, it doesn’t matter what we watch. Nothing will ever erase him from my mind.

  We’re in awe when we walk into the Knoxville Civic Coliseum. Throngs of people mill about, sipping beer, standing in line to buy all the Journey merch. Sunny drags me to the line, purchasing a tank, a poster, and one for me as well.

  “For the tickets. It’s the least I can do,” she says.

  “Thanks. It’s not like I bought them.”

  There’s a pang in my heart. I love Sunny, and I’m glad she’s with me. But…I should be experiencing this with Knox. This concert was supposed to be our final weekend. And I can only imagine how we’d have spent the night. All primed and ready to go from the concert. Steve Perry’s voice is a known aphrodisiac, after all.

  Now, it feels like he’s been gone for forever.

  Sunny bumps my shoulder with hers. “Not tonight, Meems. For just one night, forget about him. Let’s have fun.”

  I hook my hair behind my ear and plaster on a smile. Then I loop my arm through hers. “You’re right. Forget him.”

  I hold myself together most of the time. Until about halfway through the concert, when Steve Perry, shirtless and hair flowing, croons the bridge of “Stay Awhile.”

  I lose it, bursting into tears that stream like molten lava down my cheeks. The proverbial dam breaks, damaged beyond repair, unleashing every last drop I’ve tried to hold in for nearly a month. Not wanting to make a scene, grateful Sunny’s off refilling her beer, I push through the row of people swaying back and forth to the music and rush out to the corridor. Finding an empty corner, I press my back against the wall and sink until my ass hits the floor, closing my eyes and resting my forehead against my bent knees.

  Problem is, closing my eyes just brings Knox’s intoxicating smile to my mind. Knox, who should be here with me. Knox, who left because I was too much of a coward to put my heart on the line when it mattered the most.

  Knox Wellington, who I’m pretty sure is irreplaceable. Unforgettable.

  Knox, who has no idea he left something behind.

  Something more than me.

  “Honey, are you okay?” the sweet Southern drawl draws me from my thoughts.

  When I blink my eyes open, a young couple is peering down at me. I release a shaky breath, swiping the tears off my face. “Yeah. I’m good. Thanks.” I let out a small laugh. “Bad breakup, so I’m just a tad bit emotional. Steve Perry will do that to you.”

  The woman slides down next to me, the man with her smiling sympathetically.

  “I’m Allison. This here’s my husband, Wade.”

  He tips his baseball cap. “Nice to meet ya.”

  His kind smile and Southern drawl warm my heart. He’s tall, not quite as tall as Knox, and he has a lean build. His pretty wife has killer brown hair that cascades down her ba
ck and striking brown eyes that match. It’s her smile, though, that comforts me. It’s genuine and full of concern. For me. A stranger.

  “I’m Amelia. Husband, wow. You two look so young.”

  She laughs it off and I’m quick to continue.

  “I mean no offense, of course.”

  “None taken. You’re certainly not the first to say so, and you won’t be the last. You’re right, anyway. Wade ’n I are nineteen. Just got hitched a couple of days ago.” She holds up a finger with a simple gold wedding band. “He’s leavin’ for the Army in two weeks, so we decided to take the plunge and then take a quick road trip from Alabama to see our favorite band. So this song makes me a bit weepy, too. I’ll miss the hell outta the big lug.”

  “Baby,” Wade whispers. It’s soft, reverent, and damn if it doesn’t make my splintered heart fracture even more. “The girl’s been through the ringer, and this song doesn’t help. Maybe lighten the melancholy.”

  I wipe my tears and give them both a smile. A real, genuine smile I feel in my bones. “No, I’m happy for you. It’ll be good to hear this song play on the radio and wonder how the two of you are doing. Where you are.”

  “There are you!” Sunny’s voice interrupts us.

  She’s eyeing me warily, and I’m sure she can read my face without me telling her about my breakdown. I make introductions all around and the four of us spend the rest of the night enjoying the concert. And I mean it. I enjoy every single second.

  Maybe, just maybe, it’s all going to be okay.

  The next morning, Sunny’s making omelets. The smell of bacon in the air causes my stomach to revolt. I dash to the bathroom just in time.

  She’s instantly behind me, holding my hair back as I hurl the contents of my stomach into the toilet. Tears stream down my face with each heave until I have nothing left to lose. When I’m confident I’m finished, I flush and sit back, resting against the wall.

  Sunny’s watching me with curious eyes. “You didn’t drink last night, so I know you’re not hungover. It can’t be food poisoning. We shared plates.”

  I stare at her through a watery sheen.

  “Oh, Meems.”

  A sob escapes me. She draws me into an embrace, her hands rubbing my arms.

  “I went to the doctor on Friday.” I pull back and meet her eyes. “I’m pregnant.”

  Sunny sits in stunned silence before muttering, “Holy shit.”

  I echo her sentiments. “Indeed.”

  “I mean, hell, you guys went at it like rabbits, but my gosh. I never… Wow… Fuck.”

  “Is it bad that I’m happy?”

  She rocks back onto her heels and contemplates my question. “Absolutely not. Babies are a blessing, even if they come unexpectedly.”

  “I’d never, not in a million years, choose to be a single mom. At the same time, there’s no way in hell I’m giving my baby up.” Selfishly, I’m thrilled I’ll have a piece of him for the rest of my life. Thrilled at the idea of being a mom.

  She squeezes my shoulder. “You won’t be alone, Meems. Not through any of this. I know you have a lot to think about. And probably discuss with your grams, but consider staying in Crystal Cove during your pregnancy.” She leans close and pats my belly. “What better place to get away and focus on your health and the health of this little one. And you’ll have me, Joe, Sam, and my grandma all there to help you along the way, with anything you need.”

  I lob the idea around in my mind. “You know, that’s not a terrible idea. I’d have to take off the school year, but I think Grams would understand.”

  “I’m going to be an auntie!” Sunny squeals, jumping up and hauling me up with her. She throws her arms around my neck, giving me a tight hug.

  I’m going to be a mom.

  This time, it isn’t bile rising in my stomach; it’s butterflies. They’re taking flight and swarming ferociously.

  I know, deep down, I have to find a way to tell him. I just have no idea how.

  Sunny reassuringly squeezes my hand when we drive up to Grams’ house the day after the concert. It feels like a lifetime ago when I stopped by here before leaving for Crystal Cove. And now that my life’s irrevocably changing, I want Grams to know as soon as possible.

  It’ll be as much of a shock to her as it was to me.

  It started that night, that last night with Knox. I’d been feeling under the weather, but I chalked it up to food poisoning. And when he left the next day, it appeared my appetite went with him. Looking back, I should’ve seen the signs. Hell, I did. I just thought they were signs of grief.

  Not pregnancy.

  We were careful until that day in the cave. After? Not so much.

  I know biology. I just never thought it’d happen to me.

  Those earlier butterflies gather in my belly as I wait for Grams to answer the door.

  “Amelia, sweetheart, I didn’t expect you back for another few weeks,” Grams says as she pulls me in for a hug. She spies Sunny when she releases me. “Oh, Sunny, how wonderful to see you, too!”

  “Hi, Mrs. Halloway. It’s good to see you as well.”

  Grams ushers us into the house, and we follow her through the foyer and into her cozy living room. “I’ll grab some iced tea and be back in a jiffy.”

  I take a seat on the couch, and Sunny sits beside me.

  “It’s gonna be fine, Amelia,” she says. “I promise.”

  I sigh. “I know. I’m just so nervous.”

  Grams returns and places a tray with a pitcher of tea and three glasses. “If Sunny’s with you, I assume you’re not back for good.”

  I clear my throat. “No. We came to town for the weekend. For the Journey concert.”

  Grams’ eyes light up. “Oh, I just love that Steve Perry. The long, flowing hair, and the way he always shows off his chest.”

  Sunny snickers, causing Grams to grin.

  “Young lady, even at my age, I can appreciate the sex appeal.”

  Sunny lifts her glass in agreeance.

  “As much as I’d love to talk about the sex appeal of Steve Perry,” I say, “I need to talk to you.”

  Grams just lifts an eyebrow and waits for me to proceed.

  “I’ve decided to stay in Crystal Cove for the foreseeable future.”

  Her forehead wrinkles. “What?” She looks me up and down and moves forward to sit on the edge of the sofa. “Are you well? You’re looking a bit thin. And your coloring is off. What’s going on, Amelia?”

  “I’m not really sure how to say this…” I pause, and Sunny squeezes my hand. “I’m pregnant.”

  Grams’ expression doesn’t waver. She blinks at me and tilts her head as if she’s processing the news.

  “Grams?” I prompt.

  “Oh, sweetheart,” she breathes. “Are you happy?”

  I nod, and I mean it. “Yes. It was a shock, but once I processed it, I found I’m happy. It’s unexpected, unplanned, of course, but I wouldn’t change it.”

  Tears shimmer in her eyes. “I only wish your parents could be here.”

  “I know. Me too.”

  “May I ask who the father is?”

  Once again, I glance at Sunny, who gives me an encouraging nod. I tell Grams about meeting Knox and how we embarked on a summer romance. I leave out the fling details—she definitely doesn’t need that—and then tell her how we never planned on seeing each other again.

  “He doesn’t know my full name, but he gave me his before he left. He’s from Nashville. His name’s Knox Wellington.”

  She blanches, recognition in her features. “Knox Wellington?”

  I freeze. “Are you familiar?”

  “Yes. Umm, we’ve done business with them in the past. Amelia, are you sure it was Knox Wellington?”

  “It’s what he said his name was. I don’t see why he’d lie.”

  Dread twists a knot in my belly at the way Grams grimaces and falls back against the cushion. “Darling, I…I would be remiss if I didn’t tell you. Knox Wellington. He’s
married.”

  It’s as if the wind’s knocked out of me.

  Sunny goes rigid at my side.

  “What?” I gasp. “How can that be? His brother was there. Surely he would’ve said something.” I turn to Sunny. “Right?”

  “There has to be some sort of misunderstanding,” Sunny offers.

  “I’ll drive to Nashville and flay the bastard myself,” Grams declares. “My word! Getting a young woman pregnant when he has grown children himself!”

  I’m still reeling from her revelation. In fact, I’m pretty sure I’m going to be sick.

  Sunny jumps up and screeches, “Wait!”

  Grams and I both stare at her.

  She points to Grams. “You said he has grown children?”

  “Yes. Two boys, I believe.”

  She swivels to me. “It’s not even remotely possible for your Knox to have grown children.”

  It dawns on me. Relief rushes in as quickly as the anguish recedes. “It’s a family name.”

  The ire drains from Grams’ face. “Well, that’s a relief. Although I still have half a mind to go kick this young man’s behind. He needs to know what he’s done.”

  “Grams, calm down. First, this isn’t just on him. I was a willing participant. He doesn’t know yet. I’ll tell him. When I’m ready.”

  I just don’t know when the hell that’ll be.

  “BRO.”

  A plush baseball hits me on the side of my head. I glance up from my desk and see my brother frowning at me. “What the hell, Clay?”

  “What the hell yourself, Knox? Mom called me. She’s worried about you.”

  It’s my turn to frown. “She shouldn’t be. I’m fine.”

  Clay lifts an eyebrow in disbelief. “Dude. All you’ve done since coming back from Crystal Cove is work and school.”

  I lean back in my chair. “How is that different from any other school year?” I ask. “Besides, if I want to graduate early, I have to focus.”

  “You don’t have to do any extra shit to graduate early. You’re on track, and with Dad getting ready to go back to work, you’ll have plenty of time to balance work and school. Why don’t you ever come out anymore? Maria and I haven’t seen you in weeks.”