Incinerate Read online

  “Yeah, good luck with that. You’ll have to let me know how it turns out,” she says before grabbing her iPod out of her purse. She puts the headphones in and exits the room, leaving me alone with Tolstoy and the talking heads on ESPN.

  An hour later, I’m still trying to lose myself in the world of the Rostovs and the Bolkonskys, but my mind keeps wandering to the brown-eyed girl who’s signed on to hang out with me over the next few weeks or however long she’s going to be around. I hate that I’m thinking about her, and I hate even more that I’m going to be tortured by seeing her every day. I know she’s attracted to me. I saw it in the way she checked me out last night and then in the way her eyes took in my bare chest this morning. I have to admit that it does something for my ego since it’s been killing me to stay inactive. I swear I can feel the muscle mass melting off me every single day that passes and it's doing nothing to help the bad mood that's been hanging over me for the past few weeks.

  Closing the book and setting it aside, I contemplate going to find her to help ward off some of this loneliness that's been gradually creeping up on me since I left the hospital. If we’re going to be spending time together, we might as well get to know each other—platonically, of course. If she’s still around when I’m fully healed, then maybe we can test the physical waters. Maybe.

  I’m about to get up and go in search of her when I hear her phone beep and notice it sitting on the table. Picking it up to take to her, I can’t help but glance at the screen. It’s a text from some guy named Drew.

  Charlie, I love you. I’m back in town and I need, I want to see you as soon as possible. Please call me as soon as you get this.

  Well, fuck me cockless. All sorts of accusations start flying through my head, and I determine this guy must be her man. So much for trying to get to know her. Now I don’t even want her around if that’s the type of chick she is. Either I misjudged her attraction or she likes to step out on this Drew guy when he’s apparently out of town. And to think I was getting ready to put myself out there.

  “Hey, I found this grocery list on the side of the refrigerator. Cohen gave me some cash before he left. Want me to run to the store and pick this stuff up for you? I’ve got time. I don’t have anywhere I need to be today,” Charlie asks as she walks into the room, pulling the headphones out of her ears. She freezes when she sees me holding her phone and gives me a confused look.

  “Oh, I think your day just got a little busier. Apparently your boyfriend’s back in town. Guess I’m fortunate that I didn’t sit down on the barstool next to you last night like my dick was screaming at me to do, sweetheart. One thing you need to know about me is that I don’t fuck other men’s women. And I sure as hell don’t respect a woman who’d step out on her man,” I spit out, pissed that what I thought could be a sweet girl I could get to know has turned out to be in the same category as Megan.

  Her eyes first widen and then narrow at my words. I can see the anger spreading across her face, and while I’m confused by it, it doesn’t stop me from giving her a stare down. Who the hell does she think she is to be angry? I know she didn’t exactly hit on me, but her eyes last night told me that she wanted to. She’s standing frozen in her spot, and I can’t help but egg her on.

  “What’s the matter, Charlotte? Didn’t expect me to find out? I guess that’s just too bad for you. Here’s the thing. I don’t do cheating and I can’t stand cheaters.”

  Before I can get the last word out, she moves so fast that I can’t anticipate the slap that lands across my cheek. This isn’t the first slap I’ve ever gotten, but it is the first time it’s happened that I didn’t hear an apology immediately following it, the slapper’s eyes wide as she covers her mouth in an I can’t believe I just did that type of way. Nope, this girl meant for that slap to sting, and fuck, did it ever. I’m rubbing my jaw when I notice that her eyes look hot with anger, and I have to take a step back before she lands another blow.

  I watch as she closes her eyes and balls her fists at her sides as she takes a deep breath. She stands there in that exact spot for a few moments, and I’m hoping she’s trying to calm down. I’m still the wronged party here, if you can even call it that, but I don’t feel like getting hit again. Slowly, she opens her eyes, unclenches her fists, and glares at me once again.

  “I hope that leaves a mark, asshole.”

  What in the fucking hell?

  THIS GUY has lost his mind. He is seriously delusional, and I’m questioning the validity of the assessment that he didn’t suffer brain damage. I’m about to suggest that he get a second opinion when he interrupts my thoughts.

  “Sorry, sweetheart, but you’re going to have to hit a lot harder than that to leave a mark on my skin,” he prods, further irritating me, causing me to ball my hand into a fist again, ready to accept his challenge.

  “Let’s get a couple of things straight here, asshole. First of all, when I introduced myself to you last night, did I say, ‘Hey, sexy, I’m Charlotte. I want a good fuck and you look just like the guy to give it to me’? Well, did I?” I ask, seething with anger as he hesitates to answer me. Sure, I may have thought about his lips on my skin, but I never would’ve gone home with him on the first night, no matter what Lucy advised me to do.

  He blinks at me, looking from my fist to my face. “Uh…no?”

  “Exactly, so you can forget that whole part of your argument, but thank God you’re so fucking noble that you won’t sleep with another man’s woman. Seriously. Fucking kudos. I’ll have to get you a cookie for that.” He snorts, and I glare at him, shutting him up. “So second of all, did you ever ask if I have a boyfriend? Not that it should matter to you since you blew me off when I simply told you my name, but did you ever ask if I had a boyfriend?”

  Again, I get a blank stare before he lets out another, “No.”

  “So then ask me.”

  He clears his throat before he asks the question. “Charlotte, do you have a boyfriend?”

  Giving him a sweet smile that’s still laced with venom, I answer him. “No, Knox, for your information, I do not have a boyfriend. I did, however, have a fiancé until a couple of months ago. It looks like we have one thing in common. I, like you, cannot stand cheaters.”

  His eyes widen as the realization that he’s a complete and total asshole dawns on him. Or at least I hope it does. Wanting to have the last word, I hurriedly grab my purse and head into the kitchen to grab the cash his brother left. As I make my way towards the front door, he stops me in the living room and hands me my phone. I try to ignore the way his hand lingers on mine when I take it from him, but the feel of his rough skin turns me on, and it pisses me off even more.

  “Charlie, I—” I hold my hand up and he stops talking. I don’t bother looking up at him. I’m so angry, and I’m afraid if I see a sympathetic or apologetic look in his gorgeous green eyes my anger will melt away. I have no time for a guy who’d make assumptions about me like that, both that I’d fuck him the night I met him and that I’d cheat on my boyfriend to do so. I don’t care how hot he is—he’s clearly an arrogant cockbag I’m better off just admiring from afar.

  “Just don’t, Knox. I’ll be back with the groceries later. Maybe while I’m gone you can take the foot out of your mouth and shove it up your ass.”

  Without looking back, I leave his house. It isn’t until I’m halfway down the road that I finally stop shaking.

  LUCY LOOKS at me with wide eyes. “He did not say that!” Taking a sip of my coffee, I nod and she falls back against the couch with a look of disgust on her face.

  I called her to meet me for coffee so I could vent and calm my nerves. Knox’s grocery list wasn’t all that long, but I need time to cool off before going back to his place. To be honest, I was getting used to the idea of taking care of him while his brother is away. After Jace and Cohen had left, he seemed to have mellowed out a little, and while I was cleaning, I decided that he was probably just grumpy from having a caretaker and being cooped up inside. I was
hoping that after I was done we could lunch together and get to know each other, but it’s clear now that’s not going to happen.

  “So what’d you do? I can’t believe he snooped through your phone and then went off on you like that!” Lucy exclaims, and I know she’s going to be stuck on this for a while. Her last relationship didn’t end well and she’s still in the man-hating stage, except where Kale’s concerned.

  I grin sheepishly as I relive the slap for her. She squeals and holds up her hand for a high-five. Lucy’s all about the slap. I’ve always given her crap about it, but damn, it felt good when I did it. It might have been a little unwarranted, and I’m wondering if part of it was because I never got to give Drew the same treatment.

  “Have you ever even slapped anyone before?” she asks, and I shake my head.

  “That was definitely a first for me, but I was just so angry. And I think I was more pissed that he basically called me a slut without having to say it! All I did was say hi and tell him my name. Since when did that mean ‘please bend me over this table and do me good’?”

  Lucy giggles and shakes her head. “I saw that guy last night. He’s probably had the very thing happen to him. You know how the Army groupies around here can be when it comes to hot soldiers. They don’t call them barracks bunnies because they’re there to do housekeeping. They prey on these guys, and the men eat it up. For the most part.”

  I roll my eyes, knowing she’s right. It doesn’t escape my attention that there always seems to be attractive girls hanging around the VA office on campus.

  “I don’t get him. I’ve ‘known’ the guy for less than twenty-four hours and he’s already shot me down, blown me off, flirted with me, had to hide his hard dick, and then called me a slut in that period of time. I mean, who does that?”

  Lucy’s eyes widen and the grin on her face grows just as big. “His penis got hard and he had to hide it? Oh, sister, do tell!”

  Rolling my eyes again, I’m not surprised that’s what she latched on to from my statement. “When I was trying to get information out of him about his injuries, needs, and wants so that I can help him out in the most efficient way, I couldn’t help but notice that he kept watching me chew on my pen. I swear, he wasn’t even aware we were having a conversation. His eyes were glued to my lips…so I may have put on a little show, sucking the tip while he watched.” I grin sheepishly, and Lucy laughs.

  “Oh my god, you were teasing him?!”

  “I couldn’t help myself! Then I noticed him readjusting his crotch and then he covered it with a pillow.” I grin to myself as I remember how empowering it felt with his eyes following every movement my lips made. I felt even more confident when I realized he had an erection.

  Her head falls back again as she laughs. “You totally gave that guy spank bank material! Nice going, girl.”

  Shaking my head, I just shrug. “I seriously doubt that. I think the slap probably took care of that little problem.”

  “Or it turned him on even more. Maybe he likes it a little rough.” She pauses, and I’m sure she’s thinking about the very thing right now. “Hey, at least you learned one good thing about this guy,” she says, and I wrinkle my forehead in confusion.

  “That he likes to jump to conclusions and apparently thinks every woman on the planet wants to sleep with him? Yeah, great guy! My panties are melting just at the thought of him,” I say sarcastically, but if I’m being honest, I can totally see that actually happening.

  She takes a sip of her latte before she responds. “Not every woman on the planet. Just you. You must’ve been giving him fuck-me eyes.” She starts batting her eyelashes and I can’t help but laugh at her. “What I mean is, you know he’s not a cheater. After what happened with Drew, I’d say this guy is at least a step in the right direction. Maybe he deserves a chance. Or at least a roll in the hay.”

  “You’re kidding, right? Between his accusations and my slap, I highly doubt anything’s going to happen. I imagine we’ll barely tolerate each other until this assignment is over. And I’m absolutely not getting between the sheets with him. That’d only prove his theory that I wanted him!”

  Watching me, Lucy twirls her straw in her drink before she grins wickedly at me. “Well, did you? Don’t think I didn’t notice you practically ignoring Michael while you were staring at this guy across the bar. Hell, I had to yank you outside to get you to leave.”

  I blush, knowing I can’t keep anything from her. “Okay, fine. So maybe I thought about what it would be like for him to be a good rebound, but it wouldn’t have happened that night!”

  “Oh, Jesus, Charlie. Lighten up and stop being such a prude. A one-night stand is a great way to rebound. You get to feel good for a night without letting your heart get involved. And then you don’t have to go to bed knowing the last person to touch you was the asshole who broke your heart.”

  “How’s that working out for you, Lucy?” I ask immediately regretting it as I see the dark expression wash over her face. “Shit, Luce, I didn’t mean that.”

  Waving me off, she plants a fake smile across her face. “It’s fine, Charlie. We all have our ways of coping. Yours is crying yourself to sleep, and mine is not being alone long enough to do the same.” She catches the expression on my face and her eyes soften. She reaches across the table and places her hand on mine. “The walls are thin, honey, and you’re not exactly quiet.”

  I grin back at her, trying to lighten the mood. “Yeah, well, Lucy, you aren’t exactly quiet either, and Kale definitely isn’t.”

  We both fall into a fit of giggles, letting the serious moment pass us. She’s exactly right. We both have our own ways of coping, and I’m beginning to realize that mine is doing nothing but keeping me down. Maybe I do need to change things up. I don’t necessarily need to sleep with every guy who buys me a drink, but perhaps it’s time to loosen up and just let myself have a little fun for once. But not with Knox. I’m vowing to keep my heart—and my legs—completely void of the broody, grumpy, irritatingly good-looking soldier.

  I AM an asshole. That’s not a secret. And I’ve never hidden it or shied away from being who I am. So why do I feel so guilty for what I said to Charlie? I admit, I flew off the handle and made assumptions I shouldn’t have. The wave of jealousy that washed over me when I saw that text had me seeing red, which is fucking idiotic because I have no claim to her. I want no claim to her, but that damn slap did nothing to calm my raging dick. And although I should be happy that it’s working properly for the first time in weeks, I’m irritated as hell.

  I’ve been sitting around the house trying to read this damn book to no avail when I hear a car pull in the driveway. Setting it down, I slowly rise from the chair and make my way outside to try and wave the white flag, hoping to salvage some part of this working relationship.

  She has her head in the trunk when I approach her. “Need some help?” I ask, causing her to stand up so quickly that her head smacks the trunk door.

  “Mother fucker!” she yells, her Southern twang coming out as she rubs the spot on her head where she collided with the metal. “Dammit, Knox! Don’t sneak up on someone when they’re in an unfamiliar place and not paying attention.”

  Wincing, I do something I never do—I apologize. “Sorry, Charlie. I thought you’d hear me approaching. Umm, can I help?”

  She looks at me, scoffing, and instantly I can tell that time does not make Charlie Davenport cool off quickly. “And have you exacerbate your injuries on the first day I’m supposed to be helping you? Yeah, no, thank you. This is already going to be a long enough assignment, but I’ve never backed away from one and I’m not going to start now. As for the groceries, I can get them myself.”

  I can feel my jaw tense as the frustration of being helpless washes over me. “I’m not a damn invalid, so don’t treat me like one. I still have one good arm. I think I can handle a fucking grocery bag,” I growl as I go to pick up a bag, but she intercepts it before I can grab it.

  “No, Knox! Yo
u have multiple broken bones. You had surgery for Christ’s sake! Lay down your pride for one freaking minute and get over it. I think I can carry groceries without breaking a nail, thank you very much.”

  Put in my place, I watch her for a few moments as she goes to gather up the grocery bags I distracted her from when I made her hit her head. When I think she’s finally trusting that I’m letting her do this on her own, I swoop in and grab the last two out of the trunk with my good arm. She notices at the last minute, and she moves in to grab them from me. The way she comes at me has her swinging the other bags towards my body, and my torso bears the brunt of the impact. It catches me off guard, and I begin to lose my footing.

  Time feels like it’s moving in slow motion as the realization that I’m about to kiss the concrete washes over me. I can see Charlie’s eyes widen, and she drops the bags in her hands and crosses the few feet between us, her arms wrapping around me as she tries to stop me from falling. She’s too late though, and I end up bringing her down with me as my arms clumsily and involuntarily wrap around her body.

  Fortunately, I land on my ass, but I’m shaken and suddenly I’m lying down, flat on my back on the concrete, with Charlie still in my arms. My eyes closed during the fall as I prepared for the worst, and I still have them shut, silently praying to God that I didn’t just fuck myself up even more.

  The thought that Charlie was right about just letting her do it crosses my mind, and I realize that her warm body is on top of mine. Her soft, ample breasts are pressed firmly on my bare skin, and I can feel the hardening of her nipples against me. The brace is in the way of our stomachs, but her pelvis is lined up right with my groin and fuck me if I’m not getting a semi right now. I realize that I haven’t take my pain medication since yesterday morning, and I’m amazed how one day off the stuff is already helping my erection-making abilities. Sure, I’m not rock hard and I know it’s going to deflate in two-point-five seconds, but it’s still more than I’ve felt in weeks. I’d vow to never take them again, but I’m already feeling the effects of not taking them, and this fall isn’t going to help the pain go away.